Friday, October 12, 2012

Bullying

About 2 weeks or so ago, Daniel got off the bus upset.  He didn't say anything but I could tell something was wrong.  I tried to cheer him up and told him we were going to his Dika's (Grandma) to get his hair cut.  He was really in need of a hair cut. He didn't cheer up at all. When we got to my mom's for the hair cuts, he still seemed down so I asked him how school was and he said it wasn't good.  He didn't want to elaborate though.  I had to pry it out of him and he told me what happened. First, a boy from his class poked him in his mouth with the pointy end of a stick.  The teacher talked to that boy and everything was fine there but on the playground, Daniel was playing on the play scape bridge and a boy came up and pushed him from behind causing Daniel to flip over the side and fall, landing on the top of his head.  I was outraged that no one would call me when he fell on the top of his head like that. Apparently, no one saw this. He didn't tell anyone either.  I was very upset and concerned for him and poor Daniel was crying about it for a while that evening because he was scared to go to school the next day.  I emailed his teacher and she said she wasn't aware of it and would bring up at the staff meeting that morning that that area needs to be watched more closely and that she would have Daniel show her who the boy was that pushed him so he could be dealt with.  I couldn't believe that my son, only 3 weeks into Kindergarten, could be going through his first bullying experience.  After talking about this with a friend, she made me realize that it probably seemed very deliberate to Daniel and by all means scared him but that boy probably didn't hurt him on purpose.  It was probably an accident but the boy didn't know he knocked Daniel down... he was probably just pushing him out of his way while he was running across the bridge.  Never the less, the boy should be talked to about the proper way to play.

I received a lot of feedback about this topic on Facebook.  Many friends said I should speak with the boys' parents.  Some said I should march into the principle's office and demand something be done, etc, etc...  I chose to talk to his teacher (via email and in person) and ask her to keep an eye on Daniel to make sure nothing like this happens again.  I chose not to go in to the principle's office this time because his teacher told me she would handle it.  I trust that she will. This was a one time thing as of this point.  The boy that poked him in the mouth was  from his class.  Daniel came home a couple days later with a card from him  that said "I'm sorry Daniel".  That was really nice of him to do that. (I'm sure his mother made him though,  ha ha)  The boy that pushed him was a first grader that Daniel didn't know.

This whole thing really hit home for me because I was bullied as a child too.  Although mine wasn't physical bullying, it made me dread going to school too so I completely understood how Daniel was feeling.  I had low self esteem for a very long time because of my bullying experiences.  Kids can really be very mean.  I really hope and pray that we can be the generation that teaches our kids NOT to be that way.

One thing I realized as I was going through how bad I felt for Daniel and how upset he was, was that the boy that bullied him (if he was intentionally bullying him) is probably being bullied at home or by someone else in his life.  He needs to be shown love and acceptance to encourage him to stop being a bully.  So, I plan to build Daniel up as much as we can and tell him what an amazing kid he is and not to worry about bullies. They only do that stuff to try to make themselves look or feel better because they don't feel good about themselves.  So, in closing, I pray for those bullies that someone will love them and show them acceptance, build them up and make them feel worth while so the bullying will stop.

Thanks for reading. Comments are appreciated.

No comments:

Post a Comment